"Start listening to your heart." This is the real challenge. We're intelligent people who are forever trying to frame our world, we devise worldviews, we think our way into problems and then believe we can think our way out of them. Less thinking is needed. I live in my head, it doesn't do me any favours. I did some long distance running a few years ago and had a transcendental experience a few hours in where the love for my children nearly overwhelmed me. I've not had that profound feeling again since, I'm working on regaining it!
Very true, my wife is an example of such a person. I think it's easier for a logical head-led person to find their heart than the other way round. It just takes serious work!
Absolutely! Marriage and family are the main source of happiness for the vast majority of people, as well as the precondition for our survival as a species.
Making males all over the place unfuckable, insufferable, ugly and unwanted by women. All those Marxists, seizing the means of production for workers in the America!
Go make some more cat jokes, you fucking idiot. The vast majority of men are trash and women don't want them. Men are the problem. Go talk to the married guys on Tinder if you think you're going to make a difference. You won't.
The bear is the better choice. Men know they're trash. That's why the truth bothers you.
It's true. They have complex algorithms. They have been studying it for decades.
I become increasingly convinced that the only way to change it is to opt out of it. We're not going to defeat them in the field. We need to turn sideways to the sun, and vanish from their world. We need to build our own world.
We do need to get at the underlying truth, and attack the underlying lies, that have resulted and cause the problem. In order to marry... we have to have an actual idea what marriage is, and what the process of getting there should look like. In order to have babies we have to understand what family can and should look like. Etc Etc.
Our current society was built on sand, and is falling down. (Cool metaphor. Someone should put it in a book.)
But then that raises a question about tactics. I have gotten to the point where I do not even consider changing "the society" or "our politics." I believe the shortest route to victory is opting out. As individuals and en masse.
So kids could work to defeat the lies (a noble goal), but they can also just say, "See ya, wouldn't want to be ya" and exit stage right. That seems the shortest route to their own joy and, if done en masse, the shortest route to discrediting the lies—no?
Well, first of all, I doubt you would be here, on Substack, posting things, if you didn't believe in preaching :)
Secondly, yes, obviously if those people who know the truth started acting it out, then that is good for them.
But I took your post very much in the vein of the first thing. I took you as preaching to those who do not yet know the truth, who are confused by such things as bears vs men, and telling them 'do this'. And I am saying that many of them do not even know what 'this' means... they do not know what marriage means.
I remember one time I was riding with a young coworker and she used the term 'bastard'. I asked her if she knew what that word really meant. She answered 'someone you don't like." I drilled down and, no, she didn't know the underlying meaning of that word historically. She was literally clueless that there existed a time in history when we looked down on illegitimate children! I doubt she even understood those words.
And am I preaching to them, calling out, "Change the system, for truly it is awful" or am I preaching to them, "LEAVE the system, for truly it is awful"?
In truth, I think I do a little of the former, but mostly the latter. And my targets are people who are there, or who are reasonably close. I don't much bother with people who are really far off. I mean, I am happy to write messages that they might see, and if they see such messages a hundred times, maybe they will begin moving in the right direction. But I am not going to take my time to try to convince them one on one in a comment discussion, once I realize how far off they still are.
Interestingly, I had this conversation with my son the other day.
My view at least for my own Substack is that I have at least two different audiences. I’d like to engage in dialogue/debate/argument with people. And my son was talking about one of my posts and he says dad I don’t think you’re going to convince this guy. And I said I’m not trying to convince this guy. I’m trying to convince the other people who may be watching this exchange.
I believe that we have the responsibility to preach to those who we know will hear. But we don’t know who those are. I believe only God knows who those are. And so our audience typically is the person that were immediately responding to, the people that will hear and immediately dismiss everything we say, and the people that will hear what we say and it might make a difference in their life. And of those last two groups we can’t tell which are which
All very true. It's for those who might be watching AND to strengthen our own arguments.
But for me, nd my subject(s), the best bet is to work hard and put the time in for people who are close. Those are the arguments I need to strengthen. And I need to reach the people watching with those arguments.
Now as far as convinced immediately in a comment discussion, I fully agree with that. That’s why when I find something interesting I move it into a full post.
Remember the battle of the sexes in the 70's? This era makes that look downright quaint. It was not too long ago, I was one of the many who were concerned about overpopulation. I bought into that fully. It wasn't until the past few years that my eyes were opened to the fact that, if things continue as they are, we will likely end up having the exact opposite problem.
Some of that battle was inevitable, and probably even needed to happen, in order to even a few things out. But that work is largely done now. Now is the time to begin healing.
And yes, I too had, at one point a long time ago, bought into the left's ridiculous neo-Malthusianism. Then I learned the truth.
Now I know another truth: The left is wrong about 99% of everything. It's a useful heuristic.
I only need two wives and even with the ten or twenty kids each that’s still a drop in the ocean. But I would be satisfied with that and a few dozen other family groups to form a cult with on organic farms. The only way we can win this war is if a leader appears to lead the righteous to total victory.
Kulak (https://www.anarchonomicon.com/) points out that if you go far back enough in genetic research, each of us has 17 female relatives to one male. That would indicate lots of death in war and polygamy.
But yeah, opting out and building new things—especially natural things, and especially ones that produce five kids, who produce 25, who produce 125, and so on and so on, is the way. Demographics is destiny.
I follow and enjoy your writing for our dissenting views. I truly believe that the best path to political understanding is to fully submerge yourself in the opposite party’s opinions. Here are a few thoughts I had during your post.
As a 29 year old female with no children, I ASSURE you I want more than anything to be a mother and raise a family in a safe, stable home with happily married parents. But for me, having kids would be incredibly irresponsible right now. There’s multiple reasons for that, but what I’ll focus on here is the economy. A bachelors degree is the new high school diploma and because of that I am currently in graduate school (something I stubbornly put off for most of my 20s.) When I am done I will be over 100k in debt. I also live in downstate NY where you need to make six figures to afford a one bedroom apartment. I can barely feed myself, how can I bring a kid into this world?
To your point that young adults need to start producing the next generation, I’d like to bring up the opinions of older republicans in my community. I’m part of a local community Facebook page where hundreds of older (40+) people express their absolute disgust with what’s been happening at our Ivy Leagues and plenty of other colleges across the country. In response to the protests, many have expressed and supported the very violent sentiment that these “ignorant snowflakes should be forced into Gaza so they can be killed for their un-American beliefs” (and how that way they wouldn’t have to “pay” our student loans…) So if the right is so appalled at these students (who will be running this country in the coming decades) why would they push for an even newer generation? I also find it incredibly interesting to so harshly criticize a generation THAT YOU RAISED (not you specifically, Chris, just in general.)
Anyway, those are a few of my thoughts. Obviously the whole thing is significantly more complex than we can give it credit for, but I digress.
p.s. after quite a bit of jaw clenching, I will forgive your comment on how feminism makes women “unbearable.” Agree to disagree, respectfully.
I really appreciate the effort at dialogue, rather than summarily dismissing the opportunity due to differences. I will address some of your points.
"I can barely feed myself, how can I bring a kid into this world?"
—Two answers.
The first is more general, and thus does not apply specifically to you. This notion that it is prohibitively expensive to raise children is modern mythology. Humans have been raising children for half a million years; it is only recently that this trope has arisen. You might not be able to buy your children endless gifts at Christmas time or pay for four years at Swarthmore or whatever. But you can absolutely raise children—feed, clothe, and educate them, and love them, without a ton of money. I know that the economy is messed up right now, but there are ways to navigate that minefield.
The second is specific to what you said. You have made a series of choices. Yes, I resent the fact and think it is ridiculous that our society insists on a B.A. But it is not actually necessary to fall for this. My wife's sisters all have BAs and Masters degrees or PhDs, and she out-earns all of them with none of that. Until I started doing this Substack thing, so did I! It is possible to opt out of this corrupt system. It is possible to make one's way without falling for the lies. You just have to choose.
Since we are both in NY state, I will point out that https://shagbark.substack.com/ regularly mentions how cheap things have gotten up in upstate. Utica and environs, for example, are an area where things are so cheap, you can borderline homestead and live very cheaply.
It all depends on priorities. If you want to live a different life—a normal human life, away from this madness—you can choose it. And if you want babies, you can choose babies.
In your next graf, you (partially) associate me with people criticizing your generation. I do not see how that is fair. Please re-read my short article, if you need a reminder, but I think it was pretty darned easy on your generation. Not only did I acknowledge the external impacts you have dealt with, I placed most of the blame there. And then, in almost a love letter to you, I exhort you to a joyous life in which you have freed yourselves from the madness and lies with which you have been (unfairly) afflicted.
I do not see the harsh criticism. I see a call to greatness—a call to ignore the evil and build a new world. Is it possible that you have gotten so used to critiques of your generation that you imprinted some of that on me?
Re: your last paragraph, here is the exact quote, with added emphases:
"Feminism—ninth wave, or whatever variant we’re on now—is making SOME women truly intolerable.
"Various factors are making SOME men truly pathetic."
I stand by that. Feminism has absolutely made SOME women truly intolerable. Just like various infantilizing and emasculating influences and choices have made SOME men truly pathetic. I do not walk that back one iota, because it is defensibly true.
This piece of mine was a call for you and your generation to have the thing that, for most people who have ever drawn breath on this planet, brings the most joy in life: marriage and children. To choose it. To turn your backs on everything that is holding you back from it and choose it.
“Is it possible that you have gotten so used to critiques of your generation that you imprinted some of that on me?”
Yikes, that is exactly what I did! Thanks for pointing that out, and I do indeed apologize.
Even as a feminist, I will fully admit I would LOVE for my only job to be to stay at home and raise a bunch a kids, but I’m having a hell of a time finding a man financially stable enough to make that a possibility. In fact, finding decent partners in general is quite the endeavor (hence the bear memes)! But that is certainly not your fault or problem 😂
When I meet a woman in her 20s or 30s who is a stay at home mom with a house and two cars, I want to scream, “What does your husband do and does he have single coworkers?!” But these days such a question is offensive.
The world has certainly changed. Have you ever noticed when meeting a new person, one of the go-to initial questions is “what do you do for work?” I know personally, this really makes me equate my worth with a career. So here I am in grad school slaving away so that one day I can answer that question with pride. Woman or not, society is obsessed with what you do for a living, and how you should be doing it 60-80 hours a week. I need a nap just thinking about it.
"Yikes, that is exactly what I did! Thanks for pointing that out, and I do indeed apologize."
—All good. I commend you so much for having this conversation with me.
"Even as a feminist, I will fully admit I would LOVE for my only job to be to stay at home and raise a bunch a kids"
—First-wave and a good deal of second-wave feminism were needed and made sense. But then it got wrapped up in leftism, which doesn't care for women or anyone else, only for its own power—whereupon the aspects of feminism that were needed and made sense were diluted with a bunch of BS. But that's another story for a different time. For our purposes here, it is enough to say that true feminism is not, or ought not be, in any way in conflict with the goal you have expressed of having children and being a mom!
"In fact, finding decent partners in general is quite the endeavor."
—I am 55 so perhaps not quite as old as you think, and as such, ran into many of the same cultural forces you are experiencing. These were already well underway in Los Angeles, where I lived for a long time. (And I was even a little pathetic myself for a while there.)
But I absolutely prioritized finding a wife over all other considerations. I tried and tried and tried again. I dated aspiring actresses, which can be, as I have written before, the third layer of hell. I did two different stints of online dating, and ran into a bunch of madness and sadness before I met my wonderful wife.
The point is—I never stopped trying. It was the most important thing to me, and I wasn't going to stop until it worked. People give up. But you cannot give up!
"But these days such a question is offensive."
—Ask it anyway. Make it not offensive. It is your birthright as a human person to have a (consenting) man and raise children. If anyone thinks it is weird that you have prioritized that, and that you are trying, then is that someone you want to know? Or maybe it is time that you educate them. Don't be afraid!
As to your last paragraph—yes, I have noticed it, and it is frustrating and wrong. But we re never going to change this warped society with a frontal assault. We change it by opting out. By building a new world. Our own world. And that starts with not letting them define you or telling you that you should slave away just to get the credentials and job they think you should have.
In truth, they don't really care about you and what you do. That moment where they ask you what you do lasts a few seconds. What you ACTUALLY do with your life happens every day, and you and your loved ones are the only ones affected by it. If you want to buy a run down house somewhere and fix it up with a good man, and raise some chickens and then some beautiful little Olivia-babies, do it.
Look at these people, poisoned by this modern culture, and then turn sideways to the sun and disappear.
In the new world, you and I would even be friends, because the stupid political things that separate us now would no longer be an issue, and we would be able to focus on things that actually matter.
Where are these men and do they have single coworkers? A lot of them work in the trades, their education paid by their employer and lots of them seek mates who aren't operating under the bullshit that the modern plastic world has convinced them is necessary. But that's not good enough, not high status enough for lots of people, men and women, who have swallowed the lie that a slew of degrees, the newest phone, dwelling, vehicle whatever is a must have. That you simply must live in the most expensive area because that's where everything is.
Yes, all the money traps, the $10 lattes, the plastic garbage that has zero nutrients but is called food. I've seen it first hand in my Gen X demographic but it's really gained traction since then. My niece put herself through college by applying herself and getting scholarships and then getting a job in the carpenter union to pay for the rest, her fiance is a union electrician. They live a good life and are on track for a secure future.
Another niece bemoans that there are no good men out there, works low skill minimum wage jobs because school sucks and dates a steady stream of losers who share their outlook. Yet there's always money for new tattoos, a new phone every year that costs several hundred dollars, booze, tobacco, etc. and somehow it's a mystery why they can't get ahead.
I'm not denying that it's expensive today, my wife and I feel the pinch too and sometimes you can do everything right and still be dealt a shitty hand. But the choices you make can help mitigate that, something that TV and the influencers don't tell you.
In my 20’s I moved from the Midwest for some years’ stint in NYC. The invariable intro questions of where I went to college & “what do you do now?” felt needlessly exclusionary so I feel your pain. Realize, however, that none of that will matter at all in a precious few years! Plan & choose for where you want to be while there is still time:-). Focus on identifying groups of peers with said values & get involved in those activities. You sound like just the young woman so many decent men are looking for♥️🙏🏻🇺🇸
Metaphysics, detailed throughout texts such as the Bhagavad Gita, the Upanishads, the Dhammapada, and more explain why this is occurring. We're here approaching the lowest end of self-destruction, which will lead to a phoenix rising from the ashes.
Everything like this would enrage me if I watched it. So I don't anymore. The notion that the system is 100% corrupt and should not exist is already completely baked into my cake.
Yes!, intolerable and pathetic. That's the woman and the man, these days. It's so sad. And the conditioning is so strong, to break one person out of it takes time.
Yep. And it takes smart people leading others. Like Emily W. King trying to help women understand that that men are not all the clods that so many women portray them as, nor are those women all the prizes they think they are.
This makes this forlorn old soul feel that maybe, just maybe this “war of the sexes” that began in earnest when I was in college can be reconciled. I’m a Baby Boomer who remembers the first time a girl chastised me for opening a door for her. I was born with a temperament that included the emotional characteristic that is best described as “Once burned, twice shy” so from that point on I’ve never opened a door, pulled out a chair or showed any of the then traditional courtesies shown to women. I certainly was not going to marry into what was obviously being made into a war. The even then climbing divorce rate reenforced my attitude and I swore to never marry “anything made in the United States.” As many American males have done since I went looking for a mate elsewhere and completely abandoned America as a source (except for that cute little blonde with the curly hair and the Betty Boop voice seated next to me on the airliner. That was a close one…). 🤪
I’ll close with this ladies: Men don’t protect women, show deference to you over and above what they show to each other because you’re weak! Anything but. If left to our fundamental nature we do it because YOU ARE IMPORTANT! Important at the most basic of levels, more important than us; your importance is the flame around which we circle and which guides most of what we do in our lives one way or another. There is more I could say.
—Please don't be forlorn. That is what our oppressors want. They are not as omnipotent as you think. Theirs is a house of cards!
" I swore to never marry “anything made in the United States.”
—At one point I reads that Sweden had the highest rate of mail-order brides in the world. High degrees of mind-numbingly obnoxious feminism among the women…high degrees of men seeking women elsewhere. Gee, what's the connection?
So did you marry a foreign woman?
"your importance is the flame around which we circle"
—Right, exactly. And this tendency evolved because of the exigencies of our hardscrabble primordial past. You could lose three times as many men as women in a tribe and still produce another generation. The females are simply more important. That most likely evolved into chivalry, etc.
It's all unbearable (?). In the image there's just the one couple. All the fighters following behind are singletons. Check out the infant's expression. "How did I end up here?"
I think though that there is more going on in which young people see the extent to which marriage and family is leveraged by religion and the state, and don't wish to become statistics in that world of pain if and/or when things don't work out.
This will be part of the new paradigm of the Shift. Up to now, reproduction has been an essential part of the species. That is changing in ways that we can scarcely imagine as our importances and abilities widen.
Don't fret - we are not marching to oblivion. Quite the contrary - we will have more choices than ever.
Don’t worry, the boy just needs to work on his form. That’s a 16th century mordhau grip right there lol 😂
Nice! I am sure that's what ChatGPT was going for :-D
"Start listening to your heart." This is the real challenge. We're intelligent people who are forever trying to frame our world, we devise worldviews, we think our way into problems and then believe we can think our way out of them. Less thinking is needed. I live in my head, it doesn't do me any favours. I did some long distance running a few years ago and had a transcendental experience a few hours in where the love for my children nearly overwhelmed me. I've not had that profound feeling again since, I'm working on regaining it!
It's tough—some people are all feeling, and they are borderline incapable of seeing reason. That does not help either!
Very true, my wife is an example of such a person. I think it's easier for a logical head-led person to find their heart than the other way round. It just takes serious work!
"I think it's easier for a logical head-led person to find their heart than the other way round."
—I strongly believe you are correct.
Absolutely! Marriage and family are the main source of happiness for the vast majority of people, as well as the precondition for our survival as a species.
Seems so simple, doesn't it?
Marxists and unhappy leftists hate it so much. That is a sure sign that it is a good thing!
YES IT'S THE MARXISTS!
Making males all over the place unfuckable, insufferable, ugly and unwanted by women. All those Marxists, seizing the means of production for workers in the America!
Go make some more cat jokes, you fucking idiot. The vast majority of men are trash and women don't want them. Men are the problem. Go talk to the married guys on Tinder if you think you're going to make a difference. You won't.
The bear is the better choice. Men know they're trash. That's why the truth bothers you.
Even a trash man (they get paid quite well, you know) could help straighten someone as pent up as you out. Lower your standards.
I just feel sorry for her. Leftism makes people so angry and distorted.
We have been studied like rats and getting us worked up (usually over nothing) really works - it's sorcery really.
It's true. They have complex algorithms. They have been studying it for decades.
I become increasingly convinced that the only way to change it is to opt out of it. We're not going to defeat them in the field. We need to turn sideways to the sun, and vanish from their world. We need to build our own world.
Well, yes, but, and...
We do need to get at the underlying truth, and attack the underlying lies, that have resulted and cause the problem. In order to marry... we have to have an actual idea what marriage is, and what the process of getting there should look like. In order to have babies we have to understand what family can and should look like. Etc Etc.
Our current society was built on sand, and is falling down. (Cool metaphor. Someone should put it in a book.)
You are quite correct.
But then that raises a question about tactics. I have gotten to the point where I do not even consider changing "the society" or "our politics." I believe the shortest route to victory is opting out. As individuals and en masse.
So kids could work to defeat the lies (a noble goal), but they can also just say, "See ya, wouldn't want to be ya" and exit stage right. That seems the shortest route to their own joy and, if done en masse, the shortest route to discrediting the lies—no?
Well, first of all, I doubt you would be here, on Substack, posting things, if you didn't believe in preaching :)
Secondly, yes, obviously if those people who know the truth started acting it out, then that is good for them.
But I took your post very much in the vein of the first thing. I took you as preaching to those who do not yet know the truth, who are confused by such things as bears vs men, and telling them 'do this'. And I am saying that many of them do not even know what 'this' means... they do not know what marriage means.
I remember one time I was riding with a young coworker and she used the term 'bastard'. I asked her if she knew what that word really meant. She answered 'someone you don't like." I drilled down and, no, she didn't know the underlying meaning of that word historically. She was literally clueless that there existed a time in history when we looked down on illegitimate children! I doubt she even understood those words.
Fair points.
But am I preaching to the Mass or to the Remnant? (https://mises.org/mises-daily/isaiahs-job) :-)
And am I preaching to them, calling out, "Change the system, for truly it is awful" or am I preaching to them, "LEAVE the system, for truly it is awful"?
In truth, I think I do a little of the former, but mostly the latter. And my targets are people who are there, or who are reasonably close. I don't much bother with people who are really far off. I mean, I am happy to write messages that they might see, and if they see such messages a hundred times, maybe they will begin moving in the right direction. But I am not going to take my time to try to convince them one on one in a comment discussion, once I realize how far off they still are.
See what I mean?
Interestingly, I had this conversation with my son the other day.
My view at least for my own Substack is that I have at least two different audiences. I’d like to engage in dialogue/debate/argument with people. And my son was talking about one of my posts and he says dad I don’t think you’re going to convince this guy. And I said I’m not trying to convince this guy. I’m trying to convince the other people who may be watching this exchange.
I believe that we have the responsibility to preach to those who we know will hear. But we don’t know who those are. I believe only God knows who those are. And so our audience typically is the person that were immediately responding to, the people that will hear and immediately dismiss everything we say, and the people that will hear what we say and it might make a difference in their life. And of those last two groups we can’t tell which are which
All very true. It's for those who might be watching AND to strengthen our own arguments.
But for me, nd my subject(s), the best bet is to work hard and put the time in for people who are close. Those are the arguments I need to strengthen. And I need to reach the people watching with those arguments.
Now as far as convinced immediately in a comment discussion, I fully agree with that. That’s why when I find something interesting I move it into a full post.
Dude, this must be in the thoughtscape, I just wrote about it also: https://sojournfortress.substack.com/p/build-your-own-supercomputer
Kids are awesome. Love the post.
That was a beautiful post!
I have only seen the title so far, but I think we may be thinking along similar lines with your latest also:
https://christophercook.substack.com/p/eivor-skyscrapers-in-this-moment-comanche
https://christophercook.substack.com/p/stay-system-join-us-mountains-freedom-music
Dude, your Substack is great. #FreedomMusicFriday is exactly what I wanted but didn't know it.
Thanks man! Glad to have you here. I hope my market anarchism doesn't eventually scare you off! 🤣
Remember the battle of the sexes in the 70's? This era makes that look downright quaint. It was not too long ago, I was one of the many who were concerned about overpopulation. I bought into that fully. It wasn't until the past few years that my eyes were opened to the fact that, if things continue as they are, we will likely end up having the exact opposite problem.
Some of that battle was inevitable, and probably even needed to happen, in order to even a few things out. But that work is largely done now. Now is the time to begin healing.
And yes, I too had, at one point a long time ago, bought into the left's ridiculous neo-Malthusianism. Then I learned the truth.
Now I know another truth: The left is wrong about 99% of everything. It's a useful heuristic.
I only need two wives and even with the ten or twenty kids each that’s still a drop in the ocean. But I would be satisfied with that and a few dozen other family groups to form a cult with on organic farms. The only way we can win this war is if a leader appears to lead the righteous to total victory.
Why stop at two? :-)
Kulak (https://www.anarchonomicon.com/) points out that if you go far back enough in genetic research, each of us has 17 female relatives to one male. That would indicate lots of death in war and polygamy.
But yeah, opting out and building new things—especially natural things, and especially ones that produce five kids, who produce 25, who produce 125, and so on and so on, is the way. Demographics is destiny.
I’m not opposed to more than two but I think it’s the logical minimum… that way they have someone to talk to.
Good thinking!
that kid needs to be taught how to carry that blade offensively without losing fingers, or maybe he’s a page.
Yeah. Did you see my note at the end?
tl;dr
/jk
I follow and enjoy your writing for our dissenting views. I truly believe that the best path to political understanding is to fully submerge yourself in the opposite party’s opinions. Here are a few thoughts I had during your post.
As a 29 year old female with no children, I ASSURE you I want more than anything to be a mother and raise a family in a safe, stable home with happily married parents. But for me, having kids would be incredibly irresponsible right now. There’s multiple reasons for that, but what I’ll focus on here is the economy. A bachelors degree is the new high school diploma and because of that I am currently in graduate school (something I stubbornly put off for most of my 20s.) When I am done I will be over 100k in debt. I also live in downstate NY where you need to make six figures to afford a one bedroom apartment. I can barely feed myself, how can I bring a kid into this world?
To your point that young adults need to start producing the next generation, I’d like to bring up the opinions of older republicans in my community. I’m part of a local community Facebook page where hundreds of older (40+) people express their absolute disgust with what’s been happening at our Ivy Leagues and plenty of other colleges across the country. In response to the protests, many have expressed and supported the very violent sentiment that these “ignorant snowflakes should be forced into Gaza so they can be killed for their un-American beliefs” (and how that way they wouldn’t have to “pay” our student loans…) So if the right is so appalled at these students (who will be running this country in the coming decades) why would they push for an even newer generation? I also find it incredibly interesting to so harshly criticize a generation THAT YOU RAISED (not you specifically, Chris, just in general.)
Anyway, those are a few of my thoughts. Obviously the whole thing is significantly more complex than we can give it credit for, but I digress.
p.s. after quite a bit of jaw clenching, I will forgive your comment on how feminism makes women “unbearable.” Agree to disagree, respectfully.
I really appreciate the effort at dialogue, rather than summarily dismissing the opportunity due to differences. I will address some of your points.
"I can barely feed myself, how can I bring a kid into this world?"
—Two answers.
The first is more general, and thus does not apply specifically to you. This notion that it is prohibitively expensive to raise children is modern mythology. Humans have been raising children for half a million years; it is only recently that this trope has arisen. You might not be able to buy your children endless gifts at Christmas time or pay for four years at Swarthmore or whatever. But you can absolutely raise children—feed, clothe, and educate them, and love them, without a ton of money. I know that the economy is messed up right now, but there are ways to navigate that minefield.
The second is specific to what you said. You have made a series of choices. Yes, I resent the fact and think it is ridiculous that our society insists on a B.A. But it is not actually necessary to fall for this. My wife's sisters all have BAs and Masters degrees or PhDs, and she out-earns all of them with none of that. Until I started doing this Substack thing, so did I! It is possible to opt out of this corrupt system. It is possible to make one's way without falling for the lies. You just have to choose.
Since we are both in NY state, I will point out that https://shagbark.substack.com/ regularly mentions how cheap things have gotten up in upstate. Utica and environs, for example, are an area where things are so cheap, you can borderline homestead and live very cheaply.
It all depends on priorities. If you want to live a different life—a normal human life, away from this madness—you can choose it. And if you want babies, you can choose babies.
In your next graf, you (partially) associate me with people criticizing your generation. I do not see how that is fair. Please re-read my short article, if you need a reminder, but I think it was pretty darned easy on your generation. Not only did I acknowledge the external impacts you have dealt with, I placed most of the blame there. And then, in almost a love letter to you, I exhort you to a joyous life in which you have freed yourselves from the madness and lies with which you have been (unfairly) afflicted.
I do not see the harsh criticism. I see a call to greatness—a call to ignore the evil and build a new world. Is it possible that you have gotten so used to critiques of your generation that you imprinted some of that on me?
Re: your last paragraph, here is the exact quote, with added emphases:
"Feminism—ninth wave, or whatever variant we’re on now—is making SOME women truly intolerable.
"Various factors are making SOME men truly pathetic."
I stand by that. Feminism has absolutely made SOME women truly intolerable. Just like various infantilizing and emasculating influences and choices have made SOME men truly pathetic. I do not walk that back one iota, because it is defensibly true.
This piece of mine was a call for you and your generation to have the thing that, for most people who have ever drawn breath on this planet, brings the most joy in life: marriage and children. To choose it. To turn your backs on everything that is holding you back from it and choose it.
It was a wish of joy.
And that is what I wish to you.
“Is it possible that you have gotten so used to critiques of your generation that you imprinted some of that on me?”
Yikes, that is exactly what I did! Thanks for pointing that out, and I do indeed apologize.
Even as a feminist, I will fully admit I would LOVE for my only job to be to stay at home and raise a bunch a kids, but I’m having a hell of a time finding a man financially stable enough to make that a possibility. In fact, finding decent partners in general is quite the endeavor (hence the bear memes)! But that is certainly not your fault or problem 😂
When I meet a woman in her 20s or 30s who is a stay at home mom with a house and two cars, I want to scream, “What does your husband do and does he have single coworkers?!” But these days such a question is offensive.
The world has certainly changed. Have you ever noticed when meeting a new person, one of the go-to initial questions is “what do you do for work?” I know personally, this really makes me equate my worth with a career. So here I am in grad school slaving away so that one day I can answer that question with pride. Woman or not, society is obsessed with what you do for a living, and how you should be doing it 60-80 hours a week. I need a nap just thinking about it.
"Yikes, that is exactly what I did! Thanks for pointing that out, and I do indeed apologize."
—All good. I commend you so much for having this conversation with me.
"Even as a feminist, I will fully admit I would LOVE for my only job to be to stay at home and raise a bunch a kids"
—First-wave and a good deal of second-wave feminism were needed and made sense. But then it got wrapped up in leftism, which doesn't care for women or anyone else, only for its own power—whereupon the aspects of feminism that were needed and made sense were diluted with a bunch of BS. But that's another story for a different time. For our purposes here, it is enough to say that true feminism is not, or ought not be, in any way in conflict with the goal you have expressed of having children and being a mom!
"In fact, finding decent partners in general is quite the endeavor."
—I am 55 so perhaps not quite as old as you think, and as such, ran into many of the same cultural forces you are experiencing. These were already well underway in Los Angeles, where I lived for a long time. (And I was even a little pathetic myself for a while there.)
But I absolutely prioritized finding a wife over all other considerations. I tried and tried and tried again. I dated aspiring actresses, which can be, as I have written before, the third layer of hell. I did two different stints of online dating, and ran into a bunch of madness and sadness before I met my wonderful wife.
The point is—I never stopped trying. It was the most important thing to me, and I wasn't going to stop until it worked. People give up. But you cannot give up!
"But these days such a question is offensive."
—Ask it anyway. Make it not offensive. It is your birthright as a human person to have a (consenting) man and raise children. If anyone thinks it is weird that you have prioritized that, and that you are trying, then is that someone you want to know? Or maybe it is time that you educate them. Don't be afraid!
As to your last paragraph—yes, I have noticed it, and it is frustrating and wrong. But we re never going to change this warped society with a frontal assault. We change it by opting out. By building a new world. Our own world. And that starts with not letting them define you or telling you that you should slave away just to get the credentials and job they think you should have.
In truth, they don't really care about you and what you do. That moment where they ask you what you do lasts a few seconds. What you ACTUALLY do with your life happens every day, and you and your loved ones are the only ones affected by it. If you want to buy a run down house somewhere and fix it up with a good man, and raise some chickens and then some beautiful little Olivia-babies, do it.
Look at these people, poisoned by this modern culture, and then turn sideways to the sun and disappear.
In the new world, you and I would even be friends, because the stupid political things that separate us now would no longer be an issue, and we would be able to focus on things that actually matter.
Where are these men and do they have single coworkers? A lot of them work in the trades, their education paid by their employer and lots of them seek mates who aren't operating under the bullshit that the modern plastic world has convinced them is necessary. But that's not good enough, not high status enough for lots of people, men and women, who have swallowed the lie that a slew of degrees, the newest phone, dwelling, vehicle whatever is a must have. That you simply must live in the most expensive area because that's where everything is.
Yes, all the money traps, the $10 lattes, the plastic garbage that has zero nutrients but is called food. I've seen it first hand in my Gen X demographic but it's really gained traction since then. My niece put herself through college by applying herself and getting scholarships and then getting a job in the carpenter union to pay for the rest, her fiance is a union electrician. They live a good life and are on track for a secure future.
Another niece bemoans that there are no good men out there, works low skill minimum wage jobs because school sucks and dates a steady stream of losers who share their outlook. Yet there's always money for new tattoos, a new phone every year that costs several hundred dollars, booze, tobacco, etc. and somehow it's a mystery why they can't get ahead.
I'm not denying that it's expensive today, my wife and I feel the pinch too and sometimes you can do everything right and still be dealt a shitty hand. But the choices you make can help mitigate that, something that TV and the influencers don't tell you.
So very well said. I tip my cap.
In my 20’s I moved from the Midwest for some years’ stint in NYC. The invariable intro questions of where I went to college & “what do you do now?” felt needlessly exclusionary so I feel your pain. Realize, however, that none of that will matter at all in a precious few years! Plan & choose for where you want to be while there is still time:-). Focus on identifying groups of peers with said values & get involved in those activities. You sound like just the young woman so many decent men are looking for♥️🙏🏻🇺🇸
Metaphysics, detailed throughout texts such as the Bhagavad Gita, the Upanishads, the Dhammapada, and more explain why this is occurring. We're here approaching the lowest end of self-destruction, which will lead to a phoenix rising from the ashes.
Agreed. But the ashes will be quite ashy before then.
There is a way to minimize the damage, but then one looks around and wonders "what/whom is worth saving"?
I guess each of us will have to make that decision.
This will enrage you. An investigative journalist has a documentary coming out shortly on how nand why we are being invaded.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQDTFY0pmgc
Everything like this would enrage me if I watched it. So I don't anymore. The notion that the system is 100% corrupt and should not exist is already completely baked into my cake.
Yes!, intolerable and pathetic. That's the woman and the man, these days. It's so sad. And the conditioning is so strong, to break one person out of it takes time.
Yep. And it takes smart people leading others. Like Emily W. King trying to help women understand that that men are not all the clods that so many women portray them as, nor are those women all the prizes they think they are.
This makes this forlorn old soul feel that maybe, just maybe this “war of the sexes” that began in earnest when I was in college can be reconciled. I’m a Baby Boomer who remembers the first time a girl chastised me for opening a door for her. I was born with a temperament that included the emotional characteristic that is best described as “Once burned, twice shy” so from that point on I’ve never opened a door, pulled out a chair or showed any of the then traditional courtesies shown to women. I certainly was not going to marry into what was obviously being made into a war. The even then climbing divorce rate reenforced my attitude and I swore to never marry “anything made in the United States.” As many American males have done since I went looking for a mate elsewhere and completely abandoned America as a source (except for that cute little blonde with the curly hair and the Betty Boop voice seated next to me on the airliner. That was a close one…). 🤪
I’ll close with this ladies: Men don’t protect women, show deference to you over and above what they show to each other because you’re weak! Anything but. If left to our fundamental nature we do it because YOU ARE IMPORTANT! Important at the most basic of levels, more important than us; your importance is the flame around which we circle and which guides most of what we do in our lives one way or another. There is more I could say.
"This makes this forlorn old soul"
—Please don't be forlorn. That is what our oppressors want. They are not as omnipotent as you think. Theirs is a house of cards!
" I swore to never marry “anything made in the United States.”
—At one point I reads that Sweden had the highest rate of mail-order brides in the world. High degrees of mind-numbingly obnoxious feminism among the women…high degrees of men seeking women elsewhere. Gee, what's the connection?
So did you marry a foreign woman?
"your importance is the flame around which we circle"
—Right, exactly. And this tendency evolved because of the exigencies of our hardscrabble primordial past. You could lose three times as many men as women in a tribe and still produce another generation. The females are simply more important. That most likely evolved into chivalry, etc.
It's all unbearable (?). In the image there's just the one couple. All the fighters following behind are singletons. Check out the infant's expression. "How did I end up here?"
LOL! AI images are hard to get right. Close enough for jazz.
I like your sentiment here and underlying desire.
I think though that there is more going on in which young people see the extent to which marriage and family is leveraged by religion and the state, and don't wish to become statistics in that world of pain if and/or when things don't work out.
This will be part of the new paradigm of the Shift. Up to now, reproduction has been an essential part of the species. That is changing in ways that we can scarcely imagine as our importances and abilities widen.
Don't fret - we are not marching to oblivion. Quite the contrary - we will have more choices than ever.
I will consider your words.